Only a Broken Heart

Only a Broken Heart - Tom Petty
Album: Wildflowers

Misty and I are beginning an extremely long journey through music history (being taught by her beloved Luke and Easton, whom I have a feeling will quickly become my beloveds as well). In preparation, I was given a list of musicians/bands that I needed to begin brushing up on. I decided to start with the already familiars that I haven't listened to in awhile or know that I enjoy, but maybe don't know as well. The truth is, I didn't really grow up in a house of music. We listened to musicals, but my dad never liked the radio on when we were driving and we never used the record player we had forever. It's not like my parents don't like music, they just weren't music people (I think I get it from my aunt, though our tastes can vastly differ). So, I've felt like most of the past 10 years that I've known music outside of Top 40 exists, I've been playing catch up. I do a pretty good job of staying current, but anything before 2000/2001 I just don't really know.

So, where Petty is concerned, I know his greatest hits. But now, I'm digging a little deeper.

"Only a Broken Heart" fits my mood today. One of my friends lost her mom last night, one of my friends is moving into her first house that she will own with her husband and daughter this weekend, and another friend gets married tomorrow. How is it possible to be so happy for one person and so sad for another at the same time? It doesn't even feel split down the middle, it's more that the emotions are swirling together, almost combining into one brand new emotion that doesn't have a name. The more times I listen to this song, the more points of view I see it from. Sometimes I'm the person he's singing about, sometimes the person singing, and sometimes I see God as the subject and "Life" as the singer. It's not a sad song, it's an honest one.

"But don't be afraid anymore, it's only a broken heart." The ironic part is, I don't feel that the line is being sarcastic, nor diminishing the pain of a broken heart. It's more of "This is part of life" it's going to happen, and you're going to get through it. And that's how this feeling inside of me is best labeled. Yes, the pain hurts, but it's also mixed with this extreme happiness, and knowing that both exist make the pain not so bad, but it also makes the light brighter. I know there's an end to pain, maybe not in this life, but at least in the one after. And knowing that there is pain, makes the great moments mean...everything. The fact that people I'm close to, even if far away they at least share my thought space, can affect me so completely in such vastly different ways only proves that pure happiness and pure sadness can exist together. Neither can rule, and if you try too much to let one have power over the other, then you'll be left powerless.

Instead, I let both come and go as they must, I feel each to the fullest, and I love through them and alongside them. I think that's survival, and in an odd way, it's peace.

XOXO-
EBG